Art fight talk?

 Yeah I know... It's been a while. But it's because of how much life changes I've been through and how I hate writing about events in a long form, as it makes me even more deeply sorry.

I have one more specific and serious topic that I wanna mention that is really close to me right now and which I will feel too deeply for the next month and more... 

Art fight is over and I wanna say that I am angry with some people getting on my hitlist, making me draw something for them and.... That's all. Nothing back, someone didn't even dare to comment on a piece that took me long and It's probably the best one I did on af so far.

I know these people don't owe me anything, but art fight really makes me just believe that people will never be grateful or that I am too nice and naive to others. Because people are not 'funny and nice' to me, because they just are genuine, no... They only see me through a free art.

I hate it

Out of like 10 attacks that I loved and enjoyed, only one person revenged me. Is my art not high quality enough???? I have mutuals who draw like 10 revenges, but get 150 attacks.... What do I lack that they have????

Anyways.... Art fight been rough this year and I was not so excited during it like last year. I think I was much more into it before the event itself, rather than during it.

Sometimes it even felt like a chore, feeling guilty for drawing for myself and not for others... I just am kind of happy it's over.

In the end of the day I have learnt that I don't need to revenge everything to everyone. I don't need to even draw a headshot for a person who drew Katamenos all wrong, ONLY BECAUSE I AM PRETTY SURE THEY WERE TRYING THEIR BEST. No they weren't, they did the worst mistakes a human could possibly make in drawing someone's characters.

Can I please stop being so kind to everyone, even If I don't like what I received?

I know it's art fight and this year many people were much more ignorant about other people than usual, because of Tik Tok. It's crazy... I already talked about all of that with one person, I just don't have more energy to say all of it again.

But I still feel a guilt for not revenging someone... I hate to be someone like I am - feeling guilty for not making some pixels and there are people not even saying a stupid THANK YOU. for getting a piece

Anyways....

XOXO,

Sincerely and entirely Yours,

Vin.